"Compromise for what...what is compromise?"

This documentary began the change in my life, several years ago.

I wrote and posted this on my Facebook, last week:
"We change our hairstyles, often, to add color to the many hats society (including the men, birthed from a black woman's womb), has thrown at us to wear; and wore it, we have - like a crown. Carrying our own suffering has never been enough. We must also, support, mother, encourage, defend, and accept all others, above our own being - else, we are simply labeled as everything BUT the very source of life (literally and figuratively), we've endlessly given. As the years go on, I'm finding, I only trust black women. We love like no other. We fight like no other. We endure like no other. So, excuse me, while I decide if I want to cut my hair, or color it lavender. I may just do both - cause I only got but one last nerve." 

I'm a big advocate of 'doing whatever the fuck you want to do'. Throughout my life, I've made decisions, for myself, that a lot of folks thought were outlandish and/or insane. I remember when I got my first tattoo (which I recently got covered up, last year), it was my 22nd birthday. I had always wanted a tattoo and I was going to have one. Who knew that was going to begin my obsession of tattooing my body, all over?? Me - I did. I loved the way it made me feel. For the first time, in my life, I felt like a woman. It made me feel sexy. The more I got, the sexier I felt. 

The idea that a tattoo was forever, never frightened me. The way my mind works? I'll just get a cover-up [tattoo], if I begin to hate any of my tats - problem solved. This is just who I am, people. I make a way for myself...A L W A Y S. It's always been best to look on the brighter side. Besides...sexy. As a black woman, it is crucial that I love myself in ways, most others are hardly qualified to give back unto me.

I can recall, watching a basketball game, with my mother (to say she is a sports fanatic, would be an understatement). "I don't understand why they have to have tattoos like that, they look so dirty." I was 8 tattoos in, by then (currently, I have 12). "I guess I should go shower, then - being dirty and all." Now, let me say this, my mother is one of the most liberal and knowledgeable adults I know (aside from my father), of her generation - but sometimes...yea. While I'm not a lover of confrontation, I have no problems pulling anyone up, on their ignorance, judgements, or discrimination(s). So much so, that my family has changed their way of thinking, based on my correcting them, whenever they've said some fucked up shit. I'm not the person you want to go toe to toe with, on how to be compassionate of things one may not understand. I hate people, because I love people so passionately, and with such an intensity. I don't have the patients to put up with anything that's below the consideration of others. Especially, when one has not harmed the other. Needless to say, my mother's tune has changed, and has even expressed wanting a tattoo of her own. Converted. just. like. that. Right on, Mommy.

Back to feeling sexy...

...aging has made me appreciate my body, mind and spirit, so much more. I am a wonder and the love I give, is unlike any other. It's taken me awhile to be able to say that - out loud, unapologetically. But the way I love, and being exactly who I am, is the very thing that makes me sexy. My hairstyles, fashion, piercings, and tattoos just add a certain je ne sais quoi.

Loving myself, in the ways I do, now - bestows a power within me. A power that could never be replicated. I'm worth it all..."For.ev.ver". I'm unforgettable. Recognize this, acknowledge it, and act accordingly - otherwise, bon voyage.

Accept who you are. Be with people who too, accept you as you are, and want to join in on loving, teaching and showing you (in the ways they love themselves, first), how to rise higher. 

Upward and onward.